Stop Negative Self-Talk And Use Positive Affirmations

Have you ever wanted to just shut that inner voice up for good? The one that beats you up and tells you horrible lies… about yourself? Everyone has an inner voice, but sometimes that nasty voice gets the best of us and creates a breeding ground for negative self-talk and destructive behaviors.

Have you ever wanted to just shut that inner voice up for good? The one that beats you up and tells you horrible lies… about yourself? Everyone has an inner voice, but sometimes that nasty voice gets the best of us and creates a breeding ground for negative self-talk and destructive behaviors.

Negative self-talk isn’t all bad. Sometimes we need the “voice of reason” to reel us back in when we might be on the verge of making a bad decision. For instance, if you’re about to attempt something that compromises the safety of yourself or others, you might need that inner critic to jump up and remind you the risk outweighs the reward.

On the other hand, negative self-talk oftentimes comes in the form of inaudible dialogue with yourself that makes you question even the smallest decisions, things you know you are quite capable of handling. It brings on self-doubt, crushes confidence and pretty much paralyzes the ability to make positive changes.

Using positive affirmations is the best defense against negative self-talk. And yes, while some people find it useful to place sticky notes with encouraging phrases and quotes all over the house and workspace, that doesn’t work for all of us.

Even though the notes are carefully posted in places we are sure to see them, they eventually get ignored because we don’t even believe them in the first place.
Thankfully there are strategies that actually work to stop the negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations!

You don’t have to “convince” yourself or repeat some mantra to get the job done. It takes a little critical thinking, but you can absolutely retrain your brain with a more objective game plan.

Here’s how to get started:

What’s Your Trigger?

You have to identify the times your inner negative dialogue begins. It might be when you are facing new challenges at work or getting ready for a blind date. Before you can stop it, you have to know when it starts.

Allow for a Gray Area

Not everything is black and white. Don’t limit yourself to thinking things are either good or bad, wonderful or horrible, beautiful or ugly. There is a middle ground, a place where there is neutrality and calmness.

Think of the last decision you made: Did the result come out exactly perfect or absolutely awful? There’s probably a grey area in there and you haven’t given it a second thought. If the results weren’t positive, they must be negative, right?

Wrong! It doesn’t have to be one or the other. Identify the grey area and it takes some of the stress out of the decision.

Worst-Case Scenario

When we talk negatively to ourselves, we are basically talking ourselves out of whatever we have planned, or want to plan. During times like this we need to go ahead and play out the worst possible scenario in our heads. The worst-case scenario rarely happens but ask yourself how you will handle the situation anyway.

Reframe & Replace

The easiest way to break a bad habit is to replace it with something good. For instance, a smoker might replace cigarettes with suckers. Now that you know your trigger, have realized there is a grey area, worked through the worst-case scenario, it’s time to reframe and replace.

Replace the negative thought with something positive: “I’ll never be good enough” could be reframed by using something you are good at as a focal point for a positive affirmation like, “I’m a very good listener” or “I’m pretty good at organizing things.”

Using Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations don’t have to be limited to quotes thoughtfully posted all over your home, as stated above. There are lots of ways to work in positive affirmations without lifting a finger.

You just have to train your mind to identify where to apply them. When you get more comfortable noticing the triggers to negative self-talk, arming yourself with positive affirmations becomes second nature.

Here are a few easy ways to incorporate using positive affirmations:

¢ Embrace your flaws and imperfections – everybody has them!
¢ Face your fears – take baby steps and conquer fears that hold you back!
¢ Meditation – being mindful and intention in thought is incredibly powerful!
¢ Do what makes you happy – if you’re happy doing it, you’re probably good at it! Use this as fuel!
¢ Be good to you – take time for self-care! It’s hard to be negative when you feel good inside and out!
¢ Be grateful – negative self-talk doesn’t have a place in a grateful mind.
¢ Surround yourself with positivity – positive people attract other positive people!

Negative self-talk can affect so many areas of life, from personal to professional, nothing is exempt. When we retrain our brains to choose positivity over the negative thought patterns, we create a more healthy and happy life.

The best part about stopping negative self-talk and using positive affirmations is that the power is in our own hands. After all, we are the only ones in control of our own thoughts!

Signs That You May be Overly Sensitive

Are you overly sensitive?

Being a sensitive person isn’t necessarily a bad thing. There are many instances in life which require us to be more in-tune to the feelings of others, a bit more sensitive and less calloused.

Having a nice balance between sensitivity and rationality is healthy. When our sensitive side is untamed and out of control it has the potential to do more harm than good.

Sensitivity gets its origin in both a genetic and environmental aspect. Some of us are genetically wired to be overly sensitive. When you couple that with coping mechanisms developed in early childhood, it could be a recipe for disaster if left untouched.

Are You Overly Sensitive?

It’s quite easy for someone on the outside to point out someone who might be overly sensitive, however, it’s much harder to recognize it in yourself. This is who you are! This is normal for you. Taking a personal inventory is often helpful, and necessary, as long as your answers are genuine.

To help you get started, take a look at the signs below in each of the three main areas of the overly sensitive: sensitivity of self, sensitivity about others and environmental sensitivity.

You might be overly sensitive of self if you:

” Often beat yourself up when you don’t meet your own expectations,
” Are terrified of rejection in any form,
” Get frequent physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension and pain, upset stomach, etc.,
” Can’t quit processing negative thoughts and emotions,
” Form unhealthy eating and sleeping habits depending on what’s happening in your life,
” Get angry or highly annoyed with situations in your life you feel are unjust or unmerited.
You might be overly sensitive about others if you:
” Worry about what others think,
” Take things on a personal level even when clearly unintended,
” Feel others are often judgmental of you and your decisions,
” Often feel surrounded by “drama” and complain about it regularly,
” Inability to just “let it go” when faced with even small amounts of turbulence,
” Get offended and even angry with people providing constructive criticism.
You might be overly environmentally sensitive if you:
” Shy away from bright lights, loud noises and over-powering smells,
” Get irritated at other’s posts on social media sites,
” Are startled easily,
” Feel extreme anxiety when confronted with violence or fear-invoking situations, even on TV,
” Don’t feel comfortable in large groups,
” Get anxious or irritated when too many things are going on simultaneously.

If these signs and symptoms sound like what you’re dealing with, you are probably overly sensitive. Again, it’s not necessarily a bad thing. And it’s not the end of the world, though it may seem that way sometimes.

Dealing with Being Overly Sensitive

Because being over sensitive is both, genetic and conditioning, we can’t really just “stop” it. However, we can learn to minimize the effects by dealing with our emotions on a different level.

There isn’t one foolproof way that works for every single person, but if you give it some time and find the right combination of things, you are sure to find a much happier balance in your emotions and levels of sensitivity.

Are Your Insecurities Holding You Back?

Don't let your insecurities hold you back.

Confidence and Insecurity might as well be the “good angel” and “bad angel” sitting atop our shoulders governing every decision. In many of us there is a constant battle within to achieve our full potential and do great things with confidence which is somehow crippled by insecurities and self-doubt.

We end up letting the “bad angel” belittle us into believing the terrible lies and then feel even worse for doing nothing about it. Insecurities can be quite a beast to overcome. The first step is learning to recognize the beast. Then avoid falling victim to the exaggerated narratives seeping into your mind.

Sounds easy enough, right? It’s not. We are conditioned throughout life to believe these insecurities are as true as the sky is blue. From cultural conditioning to what we believe as other people’s opinions, we allow the insecurities to grow into an unruly, unrelenting monster.

Signs Insecurities Are Holding You Back

” Self-deprecating talk.
” Lack of confidence when making decisions.
” Focusing on the negative in situations.
” Overly critical of self.
” Expecting rejection.
” Problems standing up for yourself.
” Difficulty accepting compliments.
” Avoid taking risks.
” Care too much about what other people think.

If any of these signs sound familiar, it’s time to take back control of your life and stop allowing insecurities to hold you back. Think of all the missed opportunities and the accomplishments just waiting for your confidence to outweigh insecurity.

Overcome Insecurity

By practicing these few steps you’ll find yourself stronger, more confident and able to hit the mute button on the “bad angel”. The negative inner-dialogue pulling you into the rabbit hole despair won’t be nearly as powerful as you make greater and greater strides in the direction of self-assurance and self-worth.

The most important part is to remember that this process is about you, not the bystanders in your life. You are the only one with the power to create the life you want and deserve.

Identify: Because insecurity is habitual, sometimes it’s hard to identify. Think of the signs listed above as triggers. They start the whole process of doubt and despair. You have to identify the instances before you can take further action.

Objectify: Once you identify a moment when you’re feeling insecure and like you want to retreat into your shell, now is the time to stop the train and objectify the situation. Look at this from an outward and unemotional standpoint. A common mistake here is to think of what others may think instead of being truly objective.

Strengthen: Now you’ll want to build up your confidence by looking at past successes and reflecting on how you felt during that time. When you recall those emotions, you’re likely to move forward with achieving that same level of self-satisfaction and accomplishment.

Reassess: So, your confidence is boosted a bit and you’re ready to take this thing on, head first. Time to reassess the previous doubts and insecurities by asking yourself some questions.

¢ What’s the worst that could possibly happen?
¢ And if the worst thing does happen, who will that affect?
¢ How will I act if the worse thing that could happen actually happens?
¢ Will I have any regrets if I let my insecurities hold me back?

Oftentimes we allow our insecurities to have so much control, they trick us into believing things will turn out one way or another when in fact that’s probably the least likely thing to happen.

Reframe the insecurity by acknowledging the worst-case scenario and apply your new confidence in knowing it will probably never happen, but if it does, you’re ready to handle it.

Follow Through: And finally, you’re going to use positive self-talk and commit to making this insecurity disappear by following through with your plan. Steer clear of any negativity and keep pushing forward.

Don’t allow yourself to hide in the turtle shell. And even if it doesn’t turn out the way you dreamed, you got out there and showed insecurity who is boss! That’s a huge step!

You’ll find that each time you follow the steps above, your insecurities diminish and a newer, stronger, more self-assured version of you emerges. Insecurities don’t have to hold you back and you are the only one with the power to make it stop.

It gets easier over time as your confidence is slowly being restored, mostly because things usually never turn out as bad as we imagine they could.